The joys of gluten free pizza!!!!!

Its funny how some things you can get used to not having. I have pretty much lost all craving for bread. Gluten free bread just leaves much to be desired. It is better to go without than to eat what is available.

But, recently, the Knox Celiac group has discovered a new flour mixture. It is called Domata Living Flour. After reading the experiences of my fellow celiacs I just had to try this flour out.

It has been described as the closest thing to the real thing. Desperate for his wife to start making meals again, my husband quickly ordered 25 pounds of flour!!!! Last night we made cheese pizza and a special gourmet chicken pesto with feta and artichoke pesto sauce. Oh it was so good to finally eat pizza again that actually tasted good.

Tonight's meal was the real test. My ultimate comfort food is chicken and dumplings. I have a cracker barrel recipe that is the best. This new flour is supposed to be able to be substituted for regular flour in any recipe... so that's what I did. We had the best chicken and dumplings!!!! Brittney ate 2 bowls!!! Even Mya ate a bowl full. And me...well I was in the closest thing to heaven this side of heaven.

So thank you thank you Domata Flour Company for your creation. Thank you God for "real" food and the motivation to cook and to eat again. And thank you to my family for letting me experiment on them.

Does anyone know how to post a scream????? Because that's what every part of me wants to do right now. That and cry, laugh, bang my head against the wall, and scream. Sometimes my life goes from bad to worse to down right hillarious in the time you can count from o to 10!!!

If I told you everything that just happened in the past 30 minutes I am not sure that you would believe it. First let me set the stage: Jason woke up last night at 1 am. He wanted to make sure he got plenty of tv time in before school. The child never went back to sleep!!! At 3 Josh woke up compeletly soaked. Did I mention he was in my bed with me and Mya??? So we piled blankets on top and attempted to go back to sleep. Josh was more than ready to go to school and I thought the day was going to start at 3...especially since Mya was wide awake now. So you now have 2 very tired boys, and one very tired mom. And one little stinker of a baby who is now into everything and has decided she doesn't need sleep any more either. And of course, this is what always happens when my husband is out of town!

So shortly before bed, I discovered that my darling Jason had convinced Josh to find scissors and help him cut all the buckles off of the life jackets. Mind you, these were not the old, moldy life jackets...these were the newer ones that could be grown into by the next in line. But no...we just had to go and invent something new with THOSE buckels.

In the midst of the normal screaming and fighting that takes place every time all five of them are together in one room, Jason fell asleep on the couch. Mya finally fell asleep. Whew... I can breathe. Yeah, right. I started popping popcorn in the microwave but forgot about it while I was doing laundry. So I burnt their snack for tomorrow's school snack. Thank God there is more popcorn! I popped more while I got Brittney to bed. Jon was supposed to be taking his pills and Josh was supposed to be going to bed. The next thing I know Josh has plopped a huge handful of butter in the bowl where Jon's pills were. I guess he just assumed it was empty???? So Jon's pills ended up covered in butter. Pills ended up back in the butter container after Josh panicked and tried to fix what he had done.

Ok, so every night I dread doing pills with Jonathan. I don't know what happened. He used to do so well but in the past several months he has had such a hard time with taking them. I don't blame him- we are up to 13 pills every night! But I hate that time with him. So we are sitting there and every night he has this ritual where as soon as he sits down he has to go to the bathroom. Every three or four pills he has to get back up and go to the bathroom. It drives me crazy! Tonight, we were attempting to swallow butter covered pills and we got all the way to the very last 3 pills. I was pushing him to finish before getting up to go to the bathroom again when he gagged and proceeded to throw up every one of the pills. UGGGG!!!!!

I won't go into all the other nasty details of the past hour... I will keep it to myself... but I leave you with the laugh... after he threw up I told Jon to go into the bathroom since he had to go again. A few seconds later, he calls me from the bathroom.... ok mom so I am in the bathroom. Ok Jon what are you doing? I am waiting for you. He had no idea why he was in there at all....never mind that he had jsut thrown up all his pills during an effort to quickly finish and make it to the potty in time!!!! The things that just make me shake my head, grab my pillow and go to bed.

One Hundred and One Degrees!!!!

Knoxville hit a record today...and so have we...the first time without airconditioning in such a high temperature! This afternoon I noticed the thermostat rising...80 degrees seemed a little too hot for the air conditioning to be working right.

So here is the part where we laugh at the bad that has come... what is it? When life throws lemons make lemonade...well, we have lemonade for sale- 5 cents a cup!!!!

I am laughing tonight. Thanking God for a swimming pool. And thanking him that I cans it back and watch the God who is more than able to provide for my needs take care of this one!

Just pray that Jon's body temp stays low... we are going to go stay at my mom's tomorrow until it gets fixed.

Until the air returns....

Joshua's First Day of School

Well, my baby has finally entered the realm of "big"! He has waited for this day for what seems like forever. The day has been circled for the past month and he has been crossing off the days.

Just like everything he does, Josh faced this new adventure with enthusiasm, independence, and an eager expectation. He announced this morning that he would be riding the bus to school. Mind made there was no looking back for this kid.

When I picked him, the first thing he said was "I didn't have to go to the principle's office." This was his greatest fear: somehow he wouldn't be able to be good and would have to go the principle's office. But he was good and he said he wasn't shy. So I think he is off to a great start...I think he takes after Brittney in so many ways.

I wish I could say I was one of those mamas who sat with kleenex in hand crying. This mama simply smiled a smile of success and quickly got back home to cherish the few hours of quiet before it was time to return to the kindergarten pickup line. I am very proud of him today!

Happy Anniversary to Me!!!!!

Today my husband and I celebrate our 11th wedding anniversary. We usually don't make big deals out of things like our anniversary, our birthdays (except for the kids), mother's and father's day. Today is really no different... we went out to a Thai Restaurant for lunch with Jon and Josh and Mya. But in my heart today this is different than the rest of the anniversaries we have celebrated.

So even though today we won't go anywhere or do anything I am making a plan to celebrate big time... I just don't know how yet. I want to celebrate because you know what...its a BIG DEAL that we have made it 11 years!!! God in his grace has cemented us together and held us through the times that have attempted to pull us apart. So I was thinking with all we have been through we should rejoice and celebrate- it is a huge thing!

Check back a little later for a little glimpse into what our eleven years as husband and wife have held! Its been quite the adventure ... one that I will gladly go one for as many more years as the Lord gives us here on the earth. One thing is for sure... there is NO ONE I would rather have walking by my side holding my hand than this precious one that God chose for me!

School has begun!!!! I must say I am happily looking forward to a few hours of semi- peace each day! Jason actually decided to go to school..his teacher is Brittney's teacher from last year. We are praising God for working that out. Ms Smythe is wonderful and up to the challenge! I am praying that we will not have the anxiety this year and he will be fine.

Jon should be set up on homebound soon and start his school year. I know he desperately wants to be at school with his friends but at the same time it makes him physically ill to be at school for any length of time. So I am going to try to get a real "homeschool" type schedule set up with him so he won't be so bored.

Jonathan had his chemo today. He is such a trooper. I wish that you all could see the way he lights up the clinic with his singing and compliments. He is forever telling the nurses how much he loves them and how beautiful they are. His counts are all really good- his sodium level was better today than it had been in a long while. Another example for why doctors should listen to mommies!

Jonathan meets Bibleman!!!!

As you can tell, this was a very special time for Jonathan and the other kids. Although Jason and Josh sort of ran the show- Jonathan enjoyed meeting his hero and talking to him. Bibleman gave Jonathan a cape and mask, a DVD, a biblezine, and a bibleman figure. He was so excited!!!

The show was incredible. At the end of the show during the invitation to ask Jesus into their hearts, Jason and Josh both went forward. This is a great step forward in our desire to lead our children to Christ and to train them in the ways of God.

We were blessed by the generosity of Bibleman and the church members who hosted the show.Shawn and I felt such joy at being together with our spiritual family. It was a refreshing feeling... the kind of "spirit" you long for and look for in a church body. So much more warmth, love, and truth all wrapped up together. My children felt it too...they wanted to know if we could just move there.

Thank you to The Rock Family Worship Center for making this weekend so special to us!

We are off!!! Thanks for praying for Jon. Please pray for a smooth trip down and back. Everyone is so excited. Tune in tomorrow for pics of Bibleman and the kids!

Please pray for Jon today!

We are supposed to leave in the morning for Alabama for the bibleman show. As it seems to be the way life is for us, everytime we plan to do something fun or special something gets in the way. Well, Jon had chemo yesterday. Today he woke up at 11am and his face is puffy, his eyes look swollen, he has a very nasty cough, and his body temp is wacky. Under his arm his temp was 91 degrees in his mouth it was 99. I am praying he isn't getting some kind of infection- Please pray that nothing will interfere with this trip. It is going to be so special. Jon is resting right now so hopefully he will feel better soon.
Thanks for your prayers.

We Have a Winner!!!!!!!! MamaLee will soon find herself relaxing with her renewed and refreshed surprise package!!!
I am not ready yet to reveal the contents (then it wouldn't be a surprise would it????) but I promise to let all of you know what is hiding inside in due time!

Thank you all for coming and visiting my blog. It was fun to "meet" you all and I look forward to visting with you in the future!

I am taking a short break from the regularly scheduled updates on life to participate in what looks like a very fun way to get to know other bloggers as well as win cool "giveaways". I am new to blogging. I have enjoyed all the other blogs I have been discovering along the way and hope to get connected to even more blogging friends in the near future.

My friend at Without Fear posted about this grand giveaway and peaked my interest. So I visited Shannon at Rocks In My Dryer and was shocked at all the giveaways just waiting for new homes. I thought I would offer one of my own and keep my fingers crossed at winning at least one of these special gifts!!!!

One giveaway I am definitely entering is the one for $300 worth of Horizon Organic milk from 5 Minutes For Mom. Anyone of us who have children (especially when you have five children!), know how much of a blessing this giveaway would be. My children love their milk!!!

Now to my exciting giveaway... I am offering a "Refreshed and Renewed Goodie Box." I won't reveal the contents of this box entirely but I will tell you it will have plenty to make you feel refreshed and ready for each new day both physically and spiritually. One item that will be included in this giveaway is my all time favorite devotional "Streams in the Desert." God has used this devotion in many of the tired, overwhelming days to refresh me and give me a sense of purpose and focus in my suffering. I hope the person who wins my giveaway will be able to join me in saying..."No matter what comes my way...Still I will say blessed be the name of the Lord"

To enter please post a comment including your email address or blogger id...if you don't tell me how to contact you I can't send you your prize!!!! If you are new to my blog please stay awhile...I hope you will be blessed. To my daily friends thanks for visiting! Sometime Friday evening I will post the winner of the Goodie Box so make sure to comment before then!

Bibleman Becomes a Reality!!!!!

I am so excited to share with you all yet another blessing sent our way today! As I mentioned before we are going to take the kids to see a Bibleman Show in Alabama on August 4th. That alone was going to be a huge surprise for the kids. Well, I was worried that we would drive all the way down there and not be able to get seats because it is a first come first served situation. I emailed the church and asked if there was anyway we could get reserved seats. Well this church, The Rock Family Worship Center, responded with way more than I could ever imagine. They have arranged for Jonathan (and the other kids) to spend time with Bibleman before the show. They are giving us the best seats in the house. And they are putting us up in a room at the Marriot close to the church.

Can you believe it?????

I am just so blown away by the things that God is providing. His blessings are in the good and the bad. I am truly learning to bless him and follow him in the bad. But sometimes it is even harder to accept and praise him for the good. How much does God do on a daily basis that we neglect to see as his hand?

Viewing life as filtered through the hands of God: The story of a miracle!

Its already way past my bedtime but there is no way I could sleep without telling you all the story of today. I am so excited to share how God worked in our lives today to show us his greatness and his love. I have titled this story "Viewing life as filtered through the hands of God" becuase I think that if we can gain that perspecitve each "trial" we endure will take on a whole new purpose. If we can begin to see the difficulties as a sign that God is working and that he is going to do something in us or through us maybe we can embrace the opportunity rather than running the opposite direction (or grumbling our way through it!)

Part of the miracle you already know. Jon's tumor is shrinking. According to the radiologist the tumor is smaller by about a milimeter on all dimensions. I acutally got to see the scans and the difference is quite noticible. Not only is it smaller, it is also less solid. It doesn't enhance the way it did three months ago. It is hoped that the tumor will continue to die and shrink away. Its funny... when Jon was in his very first surgery a dear friend was praying. She felt God had impressed upon her that this tumor was going to shrink until it just went away. That night the dr came in and said that indeed it was a tumor that would shrink away. Of course, over the next few days we found out that it was a faster growing type of a tumor that would grow not shrink....
Fast forward to this week... Just over the past few weeks in study at church and in my own time I have been reminded that when God makes promises he always fulfills them. But it is in his own time and his own way. I don't have some word from the Lord saying Jonathan will be healed... but I do have the words the Lord spoke to me the day he asked me to give him my child. Perhaps my broken child is being healed through the hope of a shrinking tumor. Perhaps my heart is being healed for this time being when God knew I needed a little glimmer of hope and direction. We will continue to pray and trust no matter the outcome.

A little more info on Jon....the dr confirmed my suspicion that the scary behavior and lethargy/ speech etc that we were seeing a few weeks ago was caused by infection not tumor growth. On Friday, Jon's white count had gone up again to 10,000 from 6,000 (which is low but is what he is running on this chemo regimen.) THis increase made me think he was getting sick again... sure enough the MRI shows a pretty yucky sinus infection. The dr is putting him on 6 weeks of antibiotics... I am hopeful this will help keep the other symptoms under control. Also, the neurologist thinks Jon is having breakthrough seizures. He has staring episodes several times a day. So we increased his seizure meds. Other than that everything is good!

Now to the other exciting miracles of the day....

First, we left the drs office this afternoon ready to head home. It was early in the afternoon...plenty of time to beat traffic and make it home in time for Shawn to go to NAshville. Sure of our plans we all climbed into the van preparing to hit the road. What is that verse about how man plans his ways but God determines his steps???? Well, after one then two then 5o or so tries we came to the realization that our van was not going to get us out of the parking garage and on towards Knoxville. OUr van was broken down and we were stranded.

I will spare you all the chaotic details of trying to figure out how to get from point A to point B with 7 people when there is not a car rental place in town with a minivan available. There was so much that could have and was going wrong. But here is the good... immediately we started talking with the kids about how sometimes God allows things to delay us so that he can protect us. I got them all together and we prayed for God to fix the van but also to protect us and to provide for what we needed. It was short and sweet but oh so life changing! A peace descended upon my normally wild children. For several hours we sat outside the drs office and they were so good. Now came the blessings:

1. A person who Shawn works with who owns a transport company and also has a child with a brain tumor (who also goes to the dr we do in Atlanta) arranged to bring a tow truck to meet us and tow the van to Carmax in Atlanta. She was not willing to take any money. So Shawn and a man from the parking lot pushed the van all the way out of the garage.

2. While we were all sitting on the sidewalk eating lunch, a sweet lady came by and stopped and said we had well behaved children. I was thinking " you just caught them at a good moment". A few minutes later she came back through the parking lot to where we were and called me over to her car. She had no idea that we were stranded there. She said I want to give you something since your children are so well behaved. Of course I was like no, you don't need to do that. She said she knew she didn't have to but wanted to. In her hands was a piece of money folded up. I couldn't see how much it was and didn't look. She handed it to me and I thanked her telling her how God was using her to bless us. I shared the situation with Jonathan and the car. She left and I looked down at my hand. In it was a $100 bill!!!!!! Ok, friends, perfect strangers just don't go up and give someone $100!!!! But this lady was used by God. Oh, what fun I had in sharing how God worked with my children. I was so excited to tell them how God does provide. How God is so happy when we are willing to go through bad times so that he is able to show himself so big. IT was so awesome... the opportunity for them to see how God answered their prayers made the 3 hours of "trial" worth it completely!!!!

3. Ok, so now you are really going to laugh. After all this we finally figured out a plan. I would stay with the kids at the hospital where they would be cool and could watch disney. Shawn went back to stand near the van. He was going to catch a ride with the tow truck when they came to take the van to Carmax. When he got over to the van, he thought he would just try one more time to start the van and.... you know how it goes....it started right up!!!! So we jumped in the car and started the long ride home!

And guess what we made it home in God's timing and his way. Along the way we saw his providence, his love, his plan, and his protection. And even better I don't have to spend the evening alone... my sweet husband who did incredibly well at holding it together during this stressful day gets to skip Nashville!!!!! Yay!!!!

I am sure there will be more to share as the week goes on... I better go to sleep now... I have to work tomorrow.... not so sure lack of sleep and needles mix too well!!!!!

GOOD NEWS!!!!!

MOre details later but Jonathan's tumor is shrinking!!!!! Yes, shrinking....Praise God!!!

From the Streams in The Desert devotional for today:

Title: Trust in Spite of How it Looks
Author: Mrs. Charles E. Cowman
Source: Streams in the Desert
Scripture Reference: 1 John 5:4

"This is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith" (1 John 5:4).

It is easy to love Him when the blue is in the sky, When summer winds are blowing, and we smell the roses nigh; There is little effort needed to obey His precious will When it leads through flower-decked valley, or over sun-kissed hill.

It is when the rain is falling, or the mist hangs in the air, When the road is dark and rugged, and the wind no longer fair, When the rosy dawn has settled in a shadowland of gray, That we find it hard to trust Him, and are slower to obey.

It is easy to trust Him when the singing birds have come, And their canticles are echoed in our heart and in our home; But 'tis when we miss the music, and the days are dull and drear, That we need a faith triumphant over every doubt and fear.

And our blessed Lord will give it; what we lack He will supply; Let us ask in faith believing--on His promises rely; He will ever be our Leader, whether smooth or rough the way, And will prove Himself sufficient for the needs of every day.

To trust in spite of the look of being forsaken; to keep crying out into the vast, whence comes no returning voice, and where seems no hearing; to see the machinery of the world pauselessly grinding on as if self-moved, caring for no life, nor shifting a hair-breadth for all entreaty, and yet believe that God is awake and utterly loving; to desire nothing but what comes meant for us from His hand; to wait patiently, ready to die of hunger, fearing only lest faith should fail--such is the victory that overcometh the world, such is faith indeed. --George MacDonald

This classic devotional is the unabridged edition of Streams in the Desert. This first edition was published in 1925 and the wording is preserved as originally written. Connotations of words may have changed over the years and are not meant to be offensive.

The pictures are a little fuzzy because Mya was in my arms so I couldn't hold very still. The flash doesn't adequately show his eyes (this picture doesn't either). I took this this afternoon. Jon has had a rough time this go around with his chemo. He has not felt well today at all. He woke up very pale and his eyes are funky... Shawn said he looks like a racoon. Pray for him to feel better tonight...

Jon had his chemo today. Thank you for your prayers for his iron levels. His hemoglobin has come up slightly! His tummy has started being affected by the iron pills... so pray that he will not have an upset tummy. Any kind of vomiting or diarrhea is not good for him at all.

I am so exicted about the next couple of weeks. There is a family who Shawn works with who is also going to Atlanta to see our neurologist. Their appt is actually at the same time as ours! I am always happy to get to connect with new people in similar situations as we are. So we may get to have dinner with them Monday night.

The kids don't know this yet but on Friday night we are going to a production by the Morristown Theatre Guild. They are performing High School Musical which is my children's all time favorite movie. It is going to be a huge surprise!!!!!!

Then in a couple of weeks Bibleman is going to be on tour in Alabama. We are making plans to go down there for the show. I really want Jonathan to get to go to this show. He is still so into Bibleman...still says he is going to be Bibleman when he grows up.

I guess we have no idea how long we have with Jonathan. Really none of us knows how long we have with each other here on this earth. We are choosing to live each day as fully as we can. So I am determined to have fun and capture these opportunities for great memories as they come our way!

Its official: I am now an "orientated" employee of Baptist Hospital. My orientation was this week...Shawn was out of town at a class for work. So the kids and I moved in with my mom and dad for a few days. It was such a blessing to know that my kiddos were in safe hands while I was gone. It was several long days and I was worried about leaving Mya for that long. Well she did amazingly well... it was probably good for her. This way she knows mom will always come back.

Thank you for your prayers this week. This was one of those times when I could just feel God's presence and protection and intervention. Everything just went so smoothly. I am excited... probably more than I should be. I kind of feel guilty for enjoying having another "occupation" besides mom. I know I shouldn't feel guilty. I am going to enjoy myself fully while I am gone and allow this opportunity to be the way God is going energize me for my calling as mother and wife.

Next week will be the scariest for me... I have only had pediatric patients. I only know how to use butterfly needles. I will have a full day at the hospital on Wednesday. I am nervous to say the least. But I can do this. I know I can. Give me a few weeks and I will be back to being good at it! I get to meet my new patients at 2 of the nursing homes on Thursday and Friday. One of the facilities is right across the street from where I live- how perfect is that????

In other news, Jonathan has chemo tomorrow. Hopefully, his iron level has improved. I will post what I find out. Then we leave on Monday for Atlanta. Jon has his MRI and oncology appt on Monday and then the four oldest have neurology appts on Tuesday. I am anxiously waiting to go to Atlanta. I want to know what is going on inside my child's brain.

I better run... we are off to the library, store and to take Britt to a birthday party.

Jonathan Update:

Jon had chemo today. Overall, he is still doing better than he was doing a few weeks ago. He has developed a rash next to his port site. We are not certain what it is...we are suspicious it is an allergic reaction to the needle being used to access the port. They have some new "safety" needles that have a plastic butterfly enclosure that looks very much like the outline of the rash. Pray that the rash will clear up quickly and not cause any complications.

Of greater concern is Jonathan's rapidly falling iron levels. His hemoglobin is 7.8 today. It is supposed to be at least 12. His actual iron level is very low. It is supposed to be above 49 and it is in the low teens. Please pray for his body to absorb the iron we are giving him. Pray for him to desire and eat the food that would give him iron naturally. Pray for him just to eat... he eats very little food.

This picture is from yesterday's July 4th festivities.... we had a picinic, marshmellows and fireworks at my aunts house. It was a good time for all of us. I was happy when Jon came out to join us for awhile.

I have added a new link on the right side of this page for Jonathan's official site. I thought this might be helpful to those of you who may only want the updates on his care and not every detail of our lives! =) I do hope that you will continue to visit this page as well.

To those of you who prayed for me concerning the job interview: Thank You! I got the job!!!!! I am very excited and nervous. I start Monday for orientation.