Merry Christmas to all our friends!!!! I hope that each of you have had a wonderful time with your families and friends this past few days.

We for the first time in quite a while have all really enjoyed our time together. Shawn has said several times how these past two days have been some of the best positive interaction we have had with our children in a very long time. He keeps saying how this is one of the best Christmas' he can remember us having. And it is true: we have had very little fighting, alot of laughing, and spent a lot of time together. It has been an incredible blessing that even in the midst of even more sickness we are having a great time together.

So here are some of our blessings this season:

1. We got a Wii. I never thought I would count a video game system as a blessing but it really is. This is a huge part of why we have had such a good time these past few days. The games are very interactive. The whole family plays together- either with or competing against each other. It has been a blast. We have discovered that we have quite the "bowler" in our family. Brittney takes the lead in bowling on the wii- she bowled a 200 on her last game! This picture is Jason discovering the wii!

2. We have heard several very genuine " Thank You Daddy/Mommy" these past few days. This has warmed my heart tremendously.

3. Sickness. Tonight my Josh is wheezing pretty badly. He has finally gone to sleep and hopefully as he rests so will his lungs. Between his coughing, wheezing and resulting severe headaches, several children with upset stomachs resulting in multiple loads of laundry, sore throats, and goopy eyes we have had our fill of germs. But this has caused us to slow down. Relax and not try to accomplish so many things. This year I forced myself to not go crazy with baking etc. I tried really hard to just enjoy the time with the kids and to rest. I am thankful that God has provided us with a man who works hard to provide us insurance and money so we can get medicine and go to the doctor. I am thankful for good doctors who take such good care of us. I am thankful that we were all able to be together on Christmas without a trip to the emergency room. I am thankful that its not as bad as it could be.

4. Friends. I am so thankful for the special friend I have who made it a point to call me on Christmas! This made me feel so loved! I am so thankful at the opportunity God may give us to be able to live in the same city for the first time in our lives. We have been friends for 14 years and have never been in the same state... our friendship was ordained by God and has endured the span of time and distance. And in my recent struggles and feelings of despair and loneliness this special friend has really been God's way of reaching out and touching my heart. We are both eagerly anticipating the announcement of our move so we can begin to dream of the reality of spending time together. It was fun to talk of how we will do things together next year for our kids birthdays or for the holidays... God knows how badly I dream of a friend to do these things with. Starbucks will be so wonderful when I can once again share it with a friend! =)

5. I guess the last thing I want to share tonight is I am thankful for hope. I am so thankful that God gives us a brand new each day. I am thankful that there is still hope for what lies on the horizon of my life. There is a grand plan. God will use me again. He will accomplish his will for my family. He will love my children and husband through me. He will give us a purpose and a vision. He will give us a place to belong. So for tonight I am so thankful that there is so much more that what these eyes can see... I am thankful for all God allows us to not have so that we will hunger for more of what if real and eternal.

Now this thankful heart is going to bed before the baby wakes up again... she didn't go to sleep last night until almost 3. Sleep well, friends!!!

Just a quick update...I didn't have time to post over the weekend. Please keep praying for Jon. Pray specifically that he will be able to take his medication without any anxiety or gagging. On Thursday he had, we believe, a form of a seizure as we were leaving to go to clinc for his chemo visit. He couldn't stand up without falling over. His eyes were seeing double and he was dizzy. He said his eyeballs were going around in a circle. He slept all the way to the hospital. We did a CT scan which was stable so we think it was a seizure- possibly induced by inconsistent levels of his medication. We are waiting to get back the results of his blood work showing the level.

Pray also for all the illness in our house to go away... I can't keep Jonathan well when everyone else is sick. Josh is having a hard time right now- asthma, allergies, a cold, maybe pink eye on top of an upset stomach. I am counting down the days to school being out so maybe we can recover.

Off to clean the house...

Christmas Cards in the Making...

I attempted christmas pictures the other day while Shawn was in Ohio. It was quite the challenge. I am not sure if I am pleased enough to keep these. What do you think???? Any of these ones winners? Their shirts by the way say, " Dear Santa, I was framed"

A Day Well Lived!!!

Yesterday was a perfect day to burn off energy outside. I was so happy to have all my housework done and nothing else that had to occupy my time. We all went out and played. Jon played baseball. Mya ran all over the yard- she is loving being a big girl. The other boys were "survivoring" with their new survivor handbook. They were pulling up rocks looking for bugs to eat! Josh said he would eat anything if he had to in order to survive! Brittney became the new photographer... we switched places and she took pictures while Mommy played. The pictures of me with Mya she took...not bad, huh? I am still "high" from my wonderful day yesterday... how refreshing to have a day well lived, filled with peace and strength from God and not one single tear!!!! Today is Brittney's actual birthday so once Jon and Mya wake up we are off to the store (which could be scary in the truck that I have never driven) to get roses for her from Daddy (who is in Ohio). Then we will head to the school for lunch with the birthday girl.

P.S. I forgot the most important thing....I know several of you are anxiously awaiting the big news about Colorado that we were supposed to get today. Well, as is the norm for our lives, the grand opening for the Colorado store has been postponed another month. So that means the decisions of who goes have been postponed as well. It looks like it will be January before we have confirmation. But we have a pretty good feeling that we may be heading back west before we know it. Until then we continue preparing to leave but living like we are staying.

Onward we go towards the goal....

This has been a week of constant battle. Thank you friends for praying diligently for us. I know God is working... I can see him transforming us. Exciting things are on the horizon if we can only hold on until then. One of my favorite teachers, Chip Ingram, says that we usually give up and quit just before things take a turn for the good. So this morning my heart is committed to press on and not quit.

Some highlights of the weekend: Brittney had a delightful 9th birthday Friday night. It was a lot of fun to watch these girls sing and dance and laugh together. We had a high school musical theme. I am always so amazed at the girl Brittney is becoming. I am so proud of her. She has had to deal with so much in these past nine years... and through it all she is becoming strong in her faith in Christ and such a sweet servant.

Added to the drama of the week- I was leaving to go get my sister to babysit for us last night and tonight and the van start hesitating and shaking. It has been having issues lately anyway. I tried accelerating through it but by the time I got to the main road it was obvious it was not going to stop. As I pulled onto the interstate the engine light started blinking rapidly. So I pulled back off and went back home. We barely made it through the intersection. Kinda freaky for me...I hate driving and really hate car issues. So Shawn left work early so we could figure out a plan to get to church. We were determined to be there. He had to go to Ohio this morning so I was going to be stranded without a working vehicle...but last night he and his friend from work put a starter in the truck (which I have never driven and makes me nervous but is here for an emergency). Another friend graciously drove Shawn to the airport this morning at 5:30am.

So here we are...on this beautifully foggy morning enjoying peace in our hearts, quiet in the house, warm coffee and gluten free blueberry muffins listening to a teaching on autentic community. All is well in my soul this morning despite the craziness that storms around me.

Fear. That is what has seized my heart tonight. Tears of fear. Exhaustion. Confusion. Frustration. Sheer Helplessness. So many thoughts. No words other than Fear. I long for the days when throwing up was just a normal sign of a stomach bug. I long for the days when I didn't look at my children and feel like I am facing death right in its eyes. I look only long enough to feel the slight twinge of what that loss would be like and I have to turn away. My heart can't bear to even consider what could become a real possibility. All I want to do is run...

There is no where to run. There is not one place that we could run to where all this would not follow. No place. There is only one place where all of this can be faced with courage... at the feet of Jesus. Tonight I am so very aware that God and I have some heart to heart conversing to do. He needs to talk and I need to listen. I need to stay a moment longer and actually consider all that he whispers in my ear as he holds me close.

Tonight the sick storm rages on... My poor husband is still battling whatever it is that has hit him. Maybe the flu? Who knows. Its awful. He called in sick today and he never ever calls in sick. I finally made it the store to buy him some sudafed ( I lost my driver's license and since you can't buy sudafed without it I was sort of out of luck until I found it this afternoon.) As I was heading back home I called to check in and Josh who has been battling a headache had thrown up all over my bed. He is the one who is causing fear in my heart tonight. I am kicking myself for not taking him to Atlanta. I know that I did what was right and that I was supposed to stay here. But I am afraid. He is resting peacefully now with migraine meds and zofran... as long as he stays that way I am ok. It is very tempting to scoop him up and take him to the ER. I know they would do a CT scan if I asked.

Please keep praying friends. I know that what we are facing is not anything more that what most of you are probably dealing with right now yourselves with sickness going around full force. Everything for us though is viewed through a shaded lens. And it really stinks sometimes. I can deal with the sickness. I can handle vomit, blood, and tears. The fear is a whole other thing in itself. So please just pray for peace. Thank you.

Well, the good news and the bad news.... The good is that we know what Jon has and it is treatable with antibiotics. He has strep throat. That combined with the stomach bug was enough to knock this little guy out! The bad news was that he was so dehydrated that he had to stay at the clinic and have iv fluid and iv antibiotics for several hours. We were blessed by a dear friend in the midst of this 6 1/2 hour hospital visit.... food from chick fil a!!!! What sweet blessing this was to my starving body- it always amazes me how God meets our needs in the least expected ways. Thank you Beth for being God's love to me today. Hopefully, Jon will be feeling better tomorrow morning. He is still feeling pretty yucky.

Shawn's birthday was today.... 37 years old!!!! Josh asked him he was walking like grandpa now... and if he was wobbly. That was one of the bright moments in the day. Unfortunately, Shawn got the nice birthday present of a fever, aches, and chills. So he is out on the couch! I think this sick stuff has got to stop. We haven't been this contaminated in a long while!

Well, I am off to bed... to make things even more crazy I have to work tomorrow morning. Not sure how I am going to pull this one off. All I know if 4 am comes awfully early. And I have only slept 2 hours since Saturday night. Mya decided she couldn't sleep last night and was awake until 4:30 and Josh woke up at 4. So I am in desperate need of sleep. More tomorrow...thanks for your diligent prayers!

Please keep praying for Jon. He is really not feeling well. He is pretty nauseated and worn out. His appetite is gone. He has had such a hard time taking his meds the past couple of days because he is so nauseated that I don't know what symptoms are caused by what. I am worried about dehydration mainly. His speech is slurring a little tonight which is bothersome as well.

I am going to call the oncologist in the morning and see if they will see him. Maybe they can just give him some fluids in the clinic and we can get things moving towards feeling better. I will post again after I know what is going on. Thanks for your prayers.